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At the beginning of my relationship, I communicated clearly to my s.o. that I considered pornography to be infidelity. My partner agreed that he would stop. He continued for years without my knowledge, even lying about his computer being broken in order to hide his use. At points he even described his use an an addiction. This deceit went on for 6 years. According to Jewish Law, is it fair to consider this infidelity equal to a physical betrayal? [Administrator's note: See an earlier related question and answer on JVO at http://www.jewishvaluesonline.org/question.php?id=304]

I recently lost my 23 year old son to an unintended drug overdose. My family is all beyond consolation. He did not "appear" to have a drug problem. He was living with his family post-college, in which he did well. He never pushed himself or really had goals, but he was so bright he always excelled. He held down a full time job after graduation, but he was caught 6 months ago stealing medication and other things in the home. He constantly lied to everyone. He started taking substances in his room and appearing "totally wasted". I started to get into conflicts with him over this not being acceptable. I consulted experts about what I should do. For his stealing I wanted him to show remorse and take responsibility for his actions by helping people less fortunate than himself - I wanted him to do do volunteer work at a hospice for people dying of AIDS, to maybe lessen his selfish self-destructive behavior, and because I thought he might learn what the fruits of drug abuse are. My wife said I was too severe on her baby,and a hospice was depressing. I wanted him to get in touch with Jewish culture and values. My wife laughed at me. I arranged for him to see a psychiatrist, but she did not learn enough about him in 6 months to help him. I am furious at my wife for undermining my efforts to help him. No one will know if my efforts would have have helped. But maybe they would. My wife refuses to say she might bear any responsibility for what happened because she sabotaged my efforts to help him.We have been married 35 years and have one living child, a 21 year girl who is much that our son was not. More pious than me. A scholar who hopes to go soon to medical school. She studied Hebrew and Yiddish and speaks to family in Yiddish. I know that I am just so angry, etc. Am I being unfair to my wife? Does it make any difference if she takes responsibility for prior actions? Unfortunately, it was never her nature to own up to the things she did. What should I do now?

Hello rabbi, I will apologize ahead of time for the words I'm about to write. I'm 14 years old, and from what I know masturbation is against Jewish law, but I find it really hard not to do so when my body really demands it. Maybe I could do it one last time because I haven't done so in three months. Please tell me what I can do that is acceptable within Jewish law and thought. [Admin Note: A similar question was answered on Jewish Values Online previously; see - http://www.jewishvaluesonline.org/question.php?id=153.]

Must one drink at Purim to fulfill the mitzvah? If so, how much? What about alcoholics in recovery? Where did this idea that you are to drink come from, anyway?

What are the Jewish rulings on cybersex (defined as two people exchanging sexual messages over the internet, often in chatrooms) and pornography, for men and for women?

What does Jewish law say about coping with spousal addiction to cybersex for 10 years in a 20 year marriage? (The addict was deceitful and betrayed trust.)

Is smoking an occassional cigar or cigarette, without inhaling, against halacha? (because you dont really end up being unhealthy this way).

If it is true that smoking cigars is against halachah (Jewish law), then why do many religious people have an occasional cigar or pipe? (I am not talking about cigarettes which are known to be Assur/forbidden).

What does Judaism say that you should do when your partner is a closet drinker?

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