I'm a single male Jew, 35 years old, well established in my career. I am now at the point where I am considering dating for marriage. I know intermarrying is wrong. However, I am terrified of dating a Jewish girl for fear her family would inevitably discover my entire family is dead, and that I would be by definition be a poor choice for suitor into any good family. All grandparents are dead. My father died of old age, my mother and sister committed suicide (presumably due to abuse by father). I've had my share of abuse by father as well, which has affected me.
I've been nonobservant and have not gone to synagogue for the entire past decade just to avoid being reminded of the hurt.
I've engaged in a lot of therapy, which has helped me to hear, an that is why I am even considering dating at all.
Do I just throw up my hands, tell myself I am not fit to marry, and just live for work? Or would the other side be at all understanding of my background and situation?
What should I do and how can I balance the mitzvot to marry and have a family, against my situation which makes me question if I can be a decent spouse and parent and fulfill the obligations to a family?
There are no reference articles matching the keywords
When Old Becomes Invisible
Posted on 05/27/2018 by Rivkah Lambert Adler in Israel
You shall rise before the aged and show deference to the old; you shall fear your God: I am Hashem. - Vayikra (Leviticus)...
Women’s Only Spaces And Spaces Without Women
Posted on 05/24/2018 by Rivkah Lambert Adler in Israel
Last night, I went to a Jewish concert by Ayelet HaShachar, a three-woman Baltimore-based band that I have been following...
Refuting Shavuot: Holiday of Intermarriage?
Posted on 05/24/2018 by Devorah Fastag in Holidays
NOTE: Jewish Values Online received an extensive refutation of a recent post and we are publishing it on its own, much as we...
Shavuot: Holiday of Intermarriage?
Posted on 05/15/2018 by Moshe Daniel Levine in Holidays
The vast majority of Jews who study the Hebrew Bible do so, often unknowingly, through the lens of over 2,000 years of...
JVO Panel of Scholars
NOW ADD JVO CONTENT TO
YOUR WEBSITE A FREE SERVICE
JVO "JEW Q's" widget on your website.