Sex and the Jews

Western culture sends us mixed messages about human sexuality. Students of Judaism are often surprised to learn of Judaism's relatively open attitude towards sex. Nevertheless, typical books about sex and Judaism, such as The Newlywed's Guide to Physical Intimacy by Jennie Rosenfeld , PhD and David S. Ribner, DSW and Kosher Sex: A Recipe for Passion and Intimacy by Rabbi Shmuley Boteach discuss sex frankly and enthusiastically, but only in the context of heterosexual marriage.

 

This book is different. Your first impression of the book The Sacred Encounter: Jewish Perspectives on Sexuality may well be that it's huge. Nearly 800 pages huge. It's huge because it covers a lot of ground. A whole lot of ground. This anthology includes 49 articles on topics ranging from sex in the Bible to sex on the internet. The book's Foreward introduces the reader to the range of topics covered with these words:

Although there are a few other voices represented, including Rabbi Mark Dratch of the Orthodox Rabbinical Council of America and Rabbi Steven Greenberg, founder of an Orthodox LGBT community support and education organization, not surprisingly, most of the articles were written by rabbis from the American Reform movement. True to the Reform movement's statement on LGBT matters which states that,"The Reform Movement has been an advocate of gay and lesbian rights since 1965," there is a significant emphasis on the issue of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender inclusion in Judaism.

 

Some of the most surprising essays are about reclaiming traditional Jewish practice in a deeper way. In "The Problem with Tz'niut - How Are Women (Not) Like Pastries?", Rabbi Dr. Dalia Marx looks at the war on women's bodies, clothing, hair, voices and faces currently taking place on the streets of Jerusalem and asks the reader to consider the deeper, more empowering meaning of tz'niut.

 

In "Taharat HaMishpachah: A Renewed Look at the Concept of Family Purity" Rabbi Denise L. Eger reviews the traditional perspective on taharat hamishpachah, generally translated as family purity. Consistent with the Reform perspective, she discards the traditional emphasis on ritual purity and impurity while attempting to reintroduce the value of family purity in a liberal context. She dismisses the traditional use of the mikveh for married women but applauds its potential use as a way liberal Jews can, "build and deepen our connection to God and our covenant."

 

Two other essays are particularly worth noting for their take on issues not generally discussed in a religious context. "Sex and Technology: Creating Sacred Space in Cyberspace" by Rabbi Elizabeth S. Wood and Debby Herbenick, PhD, MPH, draws a distinction between deceit in and excessive use and abuse of sexually explicit internet sites and ways to use the intersection of sex and technology that are "healthy, safe, and without harm to others involved."

 

The essay "Created By The Hand Of Heaven: Sex, Love, and the Androgynos" by Rabbi Elliot Kukla delves into the murky waters of "a person who is neither male nor female". What possibilities for intimacy exist for a person whose gender identity is not clearly one of the binary choices with which we are all familiar? It's a fascinating look into how Judaism deals with gender diversity.

 

The Sacred Encounter: Jewish Perspectives on Sexuality was edited by Rabbi Lisa J. Grushcow, DPhil with a dignified hand. Although there is enough material in the book to make nearly every reader uncomfortable at some point, there is no attempt to be prurient or provocative. You almost certainly won't agree with everything you read, but you will likely finish the book with a more open mind about the range of sexuality in the human experience.