Where is the Global Jewish World Headed in Respect to Reaching Out to Actual Israelis?

by Heidi Krizer Daroff 

 

Over the last many years there has been much discussion across the Jewish world about the relationship between Israel and the global Jewish community. There are so many Jews around the world who have never been to Israel and do not see themselves as part of a long line of descendants of the matriarchs and patriarchs of our people. They take on the identity of the country they reside in and do not seek out a life infused with the joys and sometimes heartache of being connected to the Jewish homeland.

Still, in many respects the connection is growing stronger thanks to smart phones, social media, and various organizations who integrate a plethora of Israel programming into their offerings.

One such offering that I feel provides an easy and worthwhile opportunity Letters of Friendship program that I am proud to be involved with. Letters of Friendship enables individuals to write to a choice of three populations in Israel (lone soldiers serving in the Israel Defense Forces, survivors of terror attacks who are battling Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and individuals with special needs), with hope of expanding to a wide variety of communities in Israel to foster direct engagement between Diaspora and Israeli Jews. The letters which often include messages of kindness, gratitude, or hope are delivered with the purpose of bringing a smile and a ‘virtual’ hug to many deserving Israelis and in the case of lone soldiers, young men and women who are doing their part to protect the land so many of us call home even if we do not actually live there.

What message are we putting into the world if we do not feel the need to write a note like this? It is understandable that not every Jew will want to participate.What concerns me though is that recently, when I approached a Jewish organization about sharing this effort with their student population, I was told that, “The choice of the populations to engage with whilst noble and no doubt coming from a good place simply reinforces the relationship between the fortunate and unfortunate.”

I was then at a loss for words. Who are the fortunate and unfortunate in that scenario? I was really saddened by this response. I sent my children to Jewish camps for several years and to my recollection they did not engage in any Israel related activities that connected them more deeply to actual individuals in Israel. Sure, they sang songs, drew pictures of the Israeli flag, learned about the cities in Israel, and ate falafel for a treat but at no point did they participate in a program that allowed them to touch the lives of an actual Israeli, beyond the point of maybe sharing a laugh with the occasional Israeli counselor at the camp, but that does not count in my book.

 

When it comes to Jewish values where is the basis for not writing one of these notes? I thought part of living Jewish values is doing something nice for somebody else simply because we can. What more of a benefit does one need to write somebody a note of friendship and kindness beyond the knowledge that your effort brought a smile to somebody’s face?

 

Has the gap between the global Jewish community and the people of Israel grown so large that simple acts of kindness to each other no longer warrant our time and attention? Wasn’t it Hillel who taught us “Do unto others as you would have done to yourself”? If I were serving as a lone soldier in the IDF and received a “thank you” note from a Jewish student in the United States I believe I would feel appreciated and remembered. In fact, when my older daughter was Bat Mitzvah and we delivered a few hundred of these letters to the IDF soldiers their smiles were ear to ear. They knew that each letter we handed them represented an actual person who took a few minutes of their time to show they cared. Developing this program to include individuals battling Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and individuals with special needs invites the writer to step forward and express a show of concern and camaraderie. This is not a pen-pal program and responses can not be guaranteed but when did that become a prerequisite for showing you care?

 

I am admittedly deeply offended by both the assertion that those on the receiving end of the letters are somehow “less fortunate” than the students who would have been writing them and at the elitist attitude that has been taken toward this opportunity. To me the response I received regarding my inquiry to include this program demonstrates a very real problem within the American Jewish community. The very notion of us versus them that too many Jewish educators
hold is destructive.

 

I believe strongly that the key to a lasting relationship to Israel and her people is based on the ‘we’. We are all Jews, we all descend from a long line of mothers and fathers who held onto their faith, and now when we are blessed to live at a point in the history of our people when our homeland is thriving it is incumbent upon us to step outside our sheltered American comfort zone and demonstrate a respect and appreciation for our fellow Jews who are living with issues or challenges most of us could not even begin to conceive of handling. I personally have written many of these letters and will continue to do. I have the greatest respect for those who are on the front lines of creating and sustaining meaningful Jewish lives in Israel. I hope that you will join with me in this particular effort and in sustaining a deep connection to the land of our ancestors.