Yom Kippur and Social Media

Over the 25 hours of Yom Kippur, we recite a litany of our sins ten times. Over and over, as individuals and as a community, we confess common, albeit unsavory, human behaviors which distance us from God.

 

In recent years, I have been relying on an expanded commentary of the Yom Kippur confession. The commentary takes a single Hebrew word and opens it up, to make it easier to connect to it on a personal level.

 

I spent a lot of time this Yom Kippur thinking about how much social media brings out a side of me that I’m not proud of. It’s a tool I use every day (except Shabbat and Jewish holidays) and it’s incredibly valuable. Like fire, it’s also incredibly dangerous if not reined in.

I was amazed at how many of the ancient words of the Yom Kippur confession relate to the dark side of social media.

 

Confession: Ashamnu – We have been guilty. “We often sinned intentionally – for profit or enjoyment.”
Social media behavior: We look at pictures others post and derive pleasure from judging them based on what they wear, what they eat, what leisure activities they pursue and what their bodies look like. We derive pleasure from judging what they wrote, even how they spell. We feel obligated to respond to a question with a comment about why our way of doing things is superior. We often feel free to comment on what we perceive as people’s shortcomings, but even if we don’t comment, the judgement lives in our heads.

 

Confession: Dibarnu dofi – We have spoken slander. “We have discredited our fellow human beings, both through speaking falsehood and through publicizing their mistakes. We have been hypocritical by saying one thing and thinking another; and by speaking of people behind their backs.”
Social media behavior: We post an article with which we disagree and we call the subject or the writer “moron of the year” or we comment “You’re an idiot.” or “Can you believe this guy?”

Confession: V’hirshanu – We have committed wickedness. “By our own actions, we have influenced other people to follow us in sinning.”
Social media behavior: We post a rant or an angry harangue that encourages others to respond with an equal amount of invective.

Confession: Zadnu – We have sinned willfully. “Someone who justifies his misdeeds is surely more apt to sin again and to drag others down with him.”
Social media behavior: We tell ourselves that the cultural norm on social media is to express ourselves without holding back. Crassness, cruelty and snap judgements are a currency of social media. We say things on social media we would never, even say to someone’s face.

 

Confession: Tafalnu sheker - We have made false accusations. “We have falsely slurred other people.”
Social media behavior: We jump to conclusions. We accuse people of all manner of ill will. We brand people with shameful labels on the basis on a single post, news article or opinion. And we do it with self-righteous indignation.

 

Confession: Latznu – We have scorned. “We have made a mockery of serious matters. We have ridiculed honest and dedicated people.”
Social media behavior:  We are certain we know what personality flaws lie at the heart of any behavior, and we don’t hesitate to point them out. We excel at this especially, but not exclusively, with politicians and other public figures.

Confession: Sararnu – We have strayed. “We have become indifferent to the service of God. [We have] a lack of serious thought about what the Torah demands of us.”
Social media behavior: We spend way too much time scrolling through our newsfeeds, looking at another BuzzFeed video and another clip of soft, fluffy kittens at play, when we could be doing something that will actually elevate us as human beings.

As a result of the connections I made this Yom Kippur, I’m taking a hard look at my own social media behavior. Honestly, I’m not going to close my social media accounts and walk away from the whole enterprise. They are too valuable to me to go to such extreme lengths. My plan is to limit my social media behavior to the exchange of useful information and inspiration.

Wish me luck.